TTaT: Another Old Lang Syne
by Timesprite
Summary: Cable and Domino spend the holidays in Westchester- and things are anything but relaxing.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: Cable, Domino, and the other assorted X-Types are not mine. They belong to Marvel, sadly. I'm not profiting from this story in any way (though the moths in my billfold make me wish I were) so please don't sue (unless you *like * to be paid in small winged insects, that is). Pg-13 for innuendo, language, and other sundry things. 

Notes: Much thanks to Threnody, DeadEye, Lyss, Lynxie, and Kaleko, all of whom looked over this thing at some point and/ or offered pillows as I slammed my head against the wall in frustration. Dedicated to Cosmic for her birthday. 

Another Old Lang Syne   
by Timesprite   
1/4 

Tell me why we're doing this again?" Domino asked, trying to stuff her bag into the overhead compartment. The plane was already filling with a myriad of travelers heading home for the holiday season. 

"Because Jean asked us to. Besides, you haven't come to a family gathering in what- almost five years?" 

"There's a reason for that. When those people gather in large numbers, things tend to explode." She sat down, letting Nathan have the window seat because she knew he hated sitting on the aisle. A few minutes later the plane lurched into motion and took off into the sky. 

JFK was crowded as they collected their baggage and worked their way outside. There was a slight wind blowing snowflakes to and fro in the night sky. They flagged down a cab, stowed their luggage and settled back for the ride into Westchester.   
Domino was leaning against the door on her side of the car, eyes on the dark landscape flying by beyond the window. 

"I shouldn't have made you come," Nathan spoke up finally. 

"I'm not mad at you," she replied, getting down to what she knew was really on his mind. "I'm not going to pretend to be overly fond of your family, Nate, you know I'm not. But if it's that important to you..." She trailed off and glanced over at him. "Though I admit I'm curious what's sparked this sudden interest in family togetherness. I don't remember you being this... enthusiastic before." 

He shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe it's just that with more time on my hands now," he paused, a slightly perplexed look on his face. "I'm starting to realize that this is the sort of thing that really matters, Dom. Life isn't about battles and destiny for me now. It's about appreciating what I've been given, not what's been taken from me." 

She raised an eyebrow skeptically. "Interesting... but what does that have to do with dragging me off to New York to spend a week with your dysfunctional relatives?" 

"Well," he replied slowly, "They were asking about you when I came to see Rachel this spring..." 

"So you brought me to keep them from hassling you. Thanks so much," she snapped in irritation. "Very thoughtful." 

"No! I- did you *want* me to leave you alone for Christmas?" He growled. "Do you want me to chose between you and them?" 

She sighed softly and turned to look out the window again. "I didn't mean it like that. It's not your fault I can't be a group player. Just do me a favor and promise me we'll spend some time away from them? Because if I have to spend an entire week in close contact with your family, I'm going to end up shooting someone, and they'll never invite us back again." 

He laughed quietly and she grudgingly let him pull her over to lean on his shoulder. "I promise."   


The mansion was lit brightly against the dark spread of woods beyond when they pulled up and disembarked. The snow was falling heavier now, swirling on the cold December wind. Jean greeted them at the door and ushered them into the foyer. 

"I'm so glad you made it." She gave Nathan a quick hug and nodded to Domino. "You must be tired. Your room is second from the end on the left-hand side of the west wing, and supper should be done fairly soon."   
  
  


"Are you sure this is the right way?" 

"Pretty sure... though things have been rearranged a little since the last time I was in this part of the house." 

"Probably because they keep having to rebuild every time the place gets blown up." 

He sighed and looked at her askance. "Can we please not start this again?" 

"I was kidding, Nate," she replied. "Wait, is this it?" She walked toward the end of the hall until she came to the one that had their names tacked on the front of it. "Here we go."   
She opened the door and went inside, dumping her bags on the bed. "Gee.... You sure your mother is going to let you share a room with a girl?" 

He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind. "You don't think we ever actually fooled them, do you?" 

"Hell no. We weren't even fooling ourselves." She'd always rationalized the distance they kept between them in public as simple common sense. An enemy always looks to exploit weaknesses and emotional attachments were like neon welcome signs. The problem was, that distance never *had* fooled anyone. So what was it they were *really* hiding from? A fear of being hurt, perhaps? They shared a history of painful relationships...was it a matter of reluctance to place themselves in such a vulnerable position again? Was all the mystery and crypticness merely cover to keep from having their hearts broken again? She frowned, then disengaged herself from his arms.   
"You go downstairs...I'll unpack and join you in a little bit." 

"You sure?" He asked hesitantly. He could feel her turmoil and put a hand on her shoulder. "The unpacking can wait." 

She sighed. "You're right. Let's get this over with." 

"It'll be fine." He smiled and took her hand in his own, squeezing it reassuringly.   


He kept that grip on her hand as they entered the living room. It was decorated for the holiday, though with such a diverse group of people, the holiday itself was a mere technicality. A large pine tree graced one corner of the room, decked with white lights and brightly colored blown glass balls. Red and white poinsettias were arranged on the mantel and several tables. An attempt was being made to start a fire in the fireplace with quite a bit of commotion and not much result.   
Most of the women where drifting between the kitchen and the dinning room, getting things ready for dinner. Jean appeared moments after they entered the room, balancing eight month old Rachel on her hip as she tried to direct the progress of the meal. 

"I was afraid you'd gotten lost," she laughed, freeing a lock of her hair from her daughter's grasp. "Anyway, it seems all the men are in a competition to see who can get that fire going... maybe you can go show them how it's done? You can show up your father." 

"I'm sure he'll *love* that," Cable replied, then glanced at Dom. "Can I trust you to not get into trouble?" 

She rolled her eyes. "I'm sure I can manage. Go play with the rest of the boys," she smirked. 

"He certainly seems to be in a good mood," Jean commented after he was gone. 

"He's... been that way lately," Domino replied, watching as the men at the other end of the room erupted into another minor argument. 

"I noticed when he came this spring that he seemed more... at peace. It's so nice to see him actually *smile.* I'm sure you had no small hand in that." 

Dom shrugged. "I don't really have much to do with it." 

"You don't give yourself enough credit," she countered, smiling. "I should really get back to the kitchen and see how things are going. You're welcome to come with... goodness knows we could use the help." 

"Uh...sure," she replied hesitantly. She wasn't terribly enthusiastic about the idea, but it was better then standing around like an idiot.   


"Domino. It is... a pleasure to see you again. It has been a long time." 

Domino sighed and turned to face the owner of the voice, stepping out of the way as Rogue walked past with a casserole dish. "It has, hasn't it?" She narrowed her eyes slightly at Storm. "Life's been busy." 

"Indeed," the other woman replied, giving her a subtle once-over. "It is a shame you and Nathan do not visit us more often." 

Domino bit back her annoyance with Storm's condescending tone. 'You promised Nate you would behave... just play nice with the weather witch,' she told herself sternly. "I'll keep it in mind," she replied as civilly as she could. Storm opened her mouth to make another comment when Jean appeared. 

"Dom, could you do me a favor?" 

"Sure," she replied, shooting Ororo a look before turning to Jean. "Though I'll warn you, I'm not much use in a kitchen." 

"Actually, I was wondering if you wouldn't mind looking after Rachel for a little while? I've got my hands full in here, and she's fussing." 

"Jean, I do not know that-" 

"It'll be no problem," She interrupted quickly before Storm could finish her protest. She took the child, who smiled up at her. 

"Thanks so much." As she turned away, Dom caught the sly smile on Jean's face. 

'Thanks,' she thought, certain the telepath would hear her. 

#You're welcome. I know Ororo can be... aggravating at times.# 

'That's an understatement.' The thought was met with the telepathic equivalent of laughter as she exited the kitchen with Rachel in her arms. "Well, kido, what do we do now?" She asked, glancing down at the child. Rachel's only response was to grin and grab a fistful of Domino's hair. "Ow. Hey, that's not a toy, y'know." She freed her hair and made a quick glance around the room. The men were still at the other end of the room, now engaged in a debate she couldn't quite make out, a fire blazing in the fireplace. 

"Looks like it's just you and me," she commented, shifting Rachel into a more comfortable position. The infant scrunched her face up and began to cry. "Great," Dom muttered under her breath. "Guess I don't blame you... I wouldn't want to be stuck with me either." Lacking a better idea, she exited the room and began making a circuit of the mansion, bouncing Rachel gently on her hip as she roamed in hopes of calming the baby. As she passed the doors to the library, she stopped to look at the array of photographs hung on the wall. They ranged from the earliest day of the academy- and the first team of X-Men- to snapshots taken at Rachel's birth. 

"There's your dad and mom," she commented, pointing to the photo of the school's five original students. "Hard to believe they were ever that... innocent. Hard to believe any of us were," she sighed. "And here's Nate," she said pointing to another. "Before all the time travel. Though we should probably avoid getting into *that* right now. I'd hate to get blamed when you need therapy. Always was a cute little bastard though." She muttered. "Great...now they'll blame me if you develop a foul mouth."   
Her eyes trailed over one of the newest pictures on the wall, depicting Cable holding his then new born sister. "Look at that, grinning like an idiot. Why doesn't he smile like that for *me*? Wait... don't answer that. I'm not sure I want to know the answer. Let me tell you something about that brother of yours. He's stubborn as h- all get out, but once you get past that, he's got a heart of gold. He just doesn't know it, most of the time. But he's never going to let you down, I know that much. So no matter how ill tempered he gets, just remember that he really *does* care." She paused. "And maybe I should take my own advice more often, huh?" Her eyes lingered a moment longer over the pictures. "This is some family you've got," she commented. "Look at everything they've been through, and they just keep bouncing back. Sure wish someone'd let me in on their secret." She smiled wryly. "Just ignore me, Rachel. You're a captive audience, and I'm running on at the mouth. I'm sure you don't want to listen to a bunch of rantings out of a bitter old merc. Anyway, I should probably get you back to your mother before everyone starts worrying." 

---- 

"Hey guys. Dinner's almost set, if you want to go get places at the table," Jean announced, interrupting the conversation. Scott waked over and wrapped his arms around his wife's waist. 

"Smells great," he murmured. "Where's Rachel?" 

"I asked Domino to look after her for awhile while the rest of us got things ready." 

"You asked *Dom* to look after her? And she agreed?" Nathan asked, looking both mildly surprised and amused. 

"I attempted to tell her it was not a good idea," Storm commented, approaching the group from the adjoining dining room. "I do not know where she-" 

"I'm right here, Storm. And look, I didn't drop her on her head or anything." Domino strode in and passed the baby to Jean. "Now, if you'll excuse me," she said tersely, "I'm going upstairs. The flight wore me out." She turned and strode back out the door. 

Cable sighed and Jean shot Storm an angry look. "Nathan..." 

"I'll go talk to her," he said, scowling. 

#I'm sorry, Nathan. I'll talk to Ororo.# 

#Don't worry about it, Jean. Dom...isn't in the best of moods. She was probably just venting steam.# He broke off the conversation as he headed up the stairs. 

----   


"What do you want?" She scowled. 

He sighed and sank down next to her on the bed. "I *know* you don't get jet lag, Dom." Her frown deepened, but she said nothing. "Fine." He stood up again. "Don't tell me what's bothering you. It's my fault for dragging you here in the first place. I should have let you stay alone in San Francisco." 

"Bastard," she muttered under her breath. "No fair making me feel guilty." 

"I'm not trying to make you feel guilty, Dom. I want to know why you feel like you have to hide." 

"Fine, okay, you want to know? They're all staring at me like it's the Second Coming or something." 

"Because you never show up! Oath, Jean nearly had a heart attack when I told her you were flying in with me." 

"I also don't need people insinuating that I can't watch over your sister without dropping her on her head," she continued bitterly. 

Cable closed his eyes and ran a hand back through his hair. "Ororo means well, Dom..." 

"But she doesn't think I can be trusted outside of a battlefield. None of them do. Am I really that inept, Nate?" She flopped back on the pillows and stared up at the ceiling. "I can't tell. Maybe I am. To tell you the truth Nate, it just scares the shit out of me. That these people- your family- manage to carry on with the semblance of a normal life when everything could crash down around them at any moment. And even then, they'd pick up the pieces and try again. I don't know how to do that. I've never even had the chance to try." She turned away from him, entirely too aware of the tears that were pricking the corners of her eyes.   
"I've been busy fighting to keep myself alive for-" the yawning gulf of her early memories rose up to greet her, "-for as long as I can remember. I wouldn't even know where to begin." 

His hand was gentle on her shoulder. "Not true. You had-" 

"What?" She sat up, eyes flashing angrily. "Milo?" She let out a strangled laugh that was closer to a sob. "That sure worked out well, didn't it?" 

He cursed at himself under his breath and griped her shoulders in his hands. "If what you want to know," he said softly but firmly, "is if there is a 'you' outside of the guns and the fighting, then the answer is yes. She's been there every time I've needed her. Never gave up on me." 

"I did give up on you." 

"You showed me what an inconsiderate bastard I'd been. It just took me awhile to figure it out." 

She jerked herself out of his grasp. "Shouldn't we be getting back downstairs?" 

---- 

#You could at least *pretend* you're enjoying yourself.# 

'I'm *trying* Nate,' she sent back, stabbing her fork at the food on her plate. 'But frankly, I couldn't care less who the Hellfire Club's recruited now, or what Magneto's next big move might be.' 

#You're sulking.# 

'I'm allowed. You did it for long enough. If I suddenly started acting as cheery as you've been lately, someone would cry 'pod person' on us.' 

#Look, we'll skip the group breakfast tomorrow, okay? There's a nice restaurant in Salem Center.# 

'Storm's glaring at me. You see that?' 

#Now you're being petty. Just ignore it.# 

'Yeah...okay.' She went back to eating her dinner, admitting to herself that she *could* put more effort into this thing. After all, it wasn't as if they could help her natural dislike of 'family' events.   
When the conversation turned into a debate on training techniques, she actually found herself getting caught up in it, defending the methods she and Nate had used with X-Force against the accusation that they were too 'harsh.' 

"You have to face the fact that it's *not* a pretty world out there. Coddling the kids is only going to get them hurt in the long run. They realize getting their asses kicked by Nate or I was a lot better than having it happen at the hands of an enemy who's not going to hesitate to finish them off." 

"But the sort of mentality that creates doesn't promote a sense of responsibility for their actions," Scott countered from across the table. "We're fighting for equality here. How are we supposed to expect the public to accept us, to no longer fear mutants if we continue to create situations that fuel those feelings of mistrust?" 

"Sometimes public relations have to take a back seat," Nathan interjected. "When you're fighting for a larger goal, you can't quibble over minor details." 

"There are some things that take precedent over the larger goal, Nathan," Scott continued. "If you alienate those you're trying to persuade, you're not going to get a very good result." 

"And sometimes dreams can be unrealistic," Domino spoke up. "You can't please everyone all the time. And honestly, there is very little that any of you could do to change people's minds. They're going to think whatever the hell they want, no matter how hard you try to fight for a 'better understanding.' All Nate and I are doing is making sure that when it gets down to the dirty job of surviving, these kids don't get run down." 

#Play nice, Dom,# Nate warned, though she could feel his amusement as the reactions she was getting out of the assembled X-Men. 

'I *am,*' she sent back. 'I didn't tell them Xavier's little crusade was bullshit, did I?' She was trying not to laugh. "Think of it as an outside perspective. You can't try to change the world if you don't know what it's like." 

"We do not try to reform killers," Storm spoke up. "We attempt to inform those who have been misguided into seeing the mutant population as something to be resented, and which must be repressed." 

"That's your choice to make," Domino replied, coolly, forcing herself to ignore the accusation in Storm's voice. "But I don't see the harm in being prepared for any eventuality." 

"Dom's right," Cable spoke again. "It's not as if we've been trying to turn X-Force away from Xavier's dream. Their choices are their own. But we've been entrusted with their well being, and I don't see the harm in ensuring that they'll be able to handle themselves in *any* situation." 

"I think we're going to have to settle this as a difference in philosophies," Jean said. "After all, we've all had very different experiences, and that can have a big impact on the way things are viewed. Now, who wants to help with the dishes?" 

---- 

"Y'r gettin' sloppy, Neena." She turned and watched the shadow that emerged from between the trees. "Never used to be able to sneak up on ya like that." 

"I was distracted." 

"Distracted'll get you killed." 

She sighed and stuffed her cold hands deeper into her pockets, beginning to think that taking a walk had been a bad idea. "Don't you have someone else to pester, old man?" 

"You're it," he replied, coming along side her. "What're you doin' out here this late anyway?" 

"Walking," she replied sarcastically, both annoyed and secretly touched by his gruff brand of concern. 

"At one in the morning in the middle of December. You and Summers have a fight of somethin'?" 

"No," she glanced over at him. "Nate and I are good," she replied hesitantly. "Well as good as we ever are anyway." 

"What's on your mind, then?" 

She frowned and stuffed her hands deeper into her pockets. "To tell you the truth, I don't really know," she sighed. "Nate asked me to come, so I came. But the longer I'm here, the more I realize I don't belong here. Makes me wonder if I'm doing the right thing." 

"Everything else aside, darlin'," he said, "are you happy?" 

She paused, looking up through the trees to the cold winter sky, stars shining bright and sharp like a thousand pinholes in the curtain of the night. "I think so," she said. "Maybe that's the thing. After all this time, it doesn't seem possible." 

---- 

He lay with his eyes closed, listening as she came into the room, 'seeing' her mind like a violet light behind his closed lids. She probably knew he wasn't asleep. Drawers opened and shut, water ran in the bathroom as she started up the shower. He relaxed against the pillows while he waited for her.   
The bathroom door opened again, a sliver of light playing across his eyelids. Sheets rustled as she climbed in next to him. "Enjoy your walk?" He asked quietly. 

"It's cold as hell out there," she responded evasively, and slid closer to him. Her still-damp hair was cool on his skin as she lay her head on his chest. 

He drew an arm around her shoulders. "It *is* December," he replied. 

"Mmm. Warm me up?" 

He chuckled slightly. "Hard to resist an offer like that." 

---- 

"We should get up." 

Domino cracked one eye open and looked at him, but made no move to detangle herself from her position half-sprawled across him. Not that he was protesting, exactly. But the bedside clock was showing quarter after eleven and he knew that someone was bound to come looking for them if they didn't get moving soon. He brushed her hair back from her face. "Come on, we'll go get breakfast." 

After a moment more, she sat up, stretching languidly. "Breakfast sounds good." She leaned over and gave him a bruising kiss (which made him strongly consider taking back his words) then climbed out of bed to get dressed.   



	2. TTaT: Another Old Lang Syne 2/4

2/4 

"Hands off," she slapped at the fingers that were trying to steal her toast. "Order something else if you're still hungry." 

"You're not eating it," he pointed out. In fact, she hadn't touched much of her food at all. 

She scowled, though her tone remained light. "It's the principal of the thing. If I let you steal my toast now, pretty soon you'll be taking all sorts of liberties." 

The small restaurant was only half-filled with patrons, mostly couples, a few families, either talking quietly or watching out large windows at snow falling lightly over Salem Center. Cable leaned back in the booth. "Something the matter?" Normally, he didn't try to pry, partly because getting Dom to part with any information unwillingly was a lost cause and partly because of the respect he had for her privacy.   
Lately, though, she'd seemed out of sorts, even before they'd come to Westchester, and he couldn't pinpoint what it was that was troubling her. 

"I'm fine," she replied, sipping her coffee. "Just not as hungry as I thought." 

"That's not what I meant." 

She set the cup down and sighed, leaning back against the padded back of the booth. "It's just- Okay, I'll be honest. The holiday season always unnerves the hell out of me, and I don't know why. It's like being five years old and terrified of what's in the attic. You don't know *why* you're scared, it's just a gut feeling. I don't know," she sighed, "there's stuff I don't remember Nate, a big chunk of my life missing. Maybe if I knew, it would make more sense."   
She rarely spoke of the gap in her memories, about anything that had happened before they'd met, for that matter, and he'd never tried to pry. Still, he'd 'seen' that blank part of her mind, not memories buried subconsciously, but rather eradicated leaving a discernible altered patch, like a psychic equivalent to scar tissue. 

"You can probably feel it, right? I mean if *I* can..." she trailed off and pushed scrambled eggs around on her plate with her fork. 

"Dom," he said, leaning forward and putting his hand on hers. "I can't fix it, if that's-" 

She shook her head. "I wasn't asking. It's just- sometimes it's really fucking weird to think I'm walking around with the psychic equivalent to a hole in the head." She frowned slightly. "I've thought about it a lot, and I figure that by this point, knowing wouldn't change a damned thing. Either there's a good reason those memories are gone, and I really don't want to screw with it, or there isn't and maybe I find out that I had a normal life after all. I'm not sure which would hurt more." She set the fork down. "I mean, what is, is. Right?" She asked wryly. 

"Right," he replied darkly. There were some days that, despite their psilink, he had to wonder what she was thinking, what drove her on. 

"Y'know, she said after a pause. "I was thinking maybe we should move." 

"Move...?" 

"Out of the warehouse. We both know the kids don't really need us anymore. They're adults... they've proven they can handle themselves." 

"You've got someplace in mind?" He asked, sipping his coffee. 

"I've got a place in Oregon," she shrugged. "It's nice, relatively close to San Francisco if they needed us for some reason. Needs work, but nothing we couldn't handle." 

"It's an idea. What brought this on?" He asked, curious. 

"Because I want to start living again, Nate. You got your big chance, defeated Apocalypse, and now your life is *yours* again. But I haven't done that yet. I'm just hanging in limbo... so I thought, why not?" 

"Dom... you're asking me to 'move in' with you?" He asked, amused grin spreading across his face, so genuine, Domino realized, that it reached his eyes. Yes, she could definitely get used to the softer side he'd been showing of late. He still had his demons of course, he'd seen and done things that would never leave him, things he wouldn't *let* himself forget. He still had a stubborn streak a mile wide and seemed to enjoy pushing all her buttons, but as Jean had observed the night before it was nice to see him smile. 

"Yeah, I guess I am," she smirked. "Think we can manage to cohabitate without killing each other?" 

"At the least, we'll have fun finding out," he replied with a tone that implied much more than his words. 

"You," she said, jabbing her fork at him, "are a dirty old man." 

"Glad I haven't lost my touch." 

She shook her head in mock indignation and got up from her seat. "C'mon. We should probably get back before your family decides we've been abducted by aliens or something." 

---- 

"Let's not go in just yet." 

"Hrm?" 

"It's nice out. Can't we just... walk?" 

He chuckled. "Sure. I doubt they'll miss us for a little while longer..." 

"Good," she grinned, scooping up a handful of snow and lobbing it at him. He dodged it, then took off after her as she darted into the tree line.   


"We're really not dressed for this," he commented, laying on his back in the snow. Dom was straddled across his waist, hands on his shoulders. Not that she was *actually* holding him down... 

"So?" She grinned. 

"So? Easy for you to say... you're not getting wet." 

"Mmmm. So I'm not. What are you gonna do about it?" 

"I think.... this." He dumped her off into the snow, then pinned her shoulders to the ground. 

"Figures," she smirked. "You always *do* like to be on top." 

---- 

"I'm not going out there." 

"Why not?" Domino stood on the ice halfway across the lake. "It's perfectly safe." 

"Aren't you supposed to have skates for this or something?" He took a tentative step out onto the ice. 

"Well, ideally, I suppose. But I doubt there are a pair lying around that just *happen* to be your size," she replied. "Besides, aside from the amusement factor, no good could come from you trying to balance on two thin strips of metal. *I* have a hard enough time not falling over." 

"So why *are* we doing this, then?" 

"Because we're on vacation and trying to enjoy ourselves? Because I'm bored and the idea of you making a fool out of yourself appeals me?" 

"I think I like the first option better," he mumbled, taking careful steps out onto the lake's frozen surface. "Stop laughing at me." 

"Sorry," she snickered. "But you should really see your face." 

"I'm *trying* not to fall on my ass," he retorted. "And you're not helping." 

"Awww. Poor little Nate afraid he's gonna fall down?" 

"Cute." 

"I know I am," she shot back, "but I fail to see what bearing that has on this conversation." 

"You *could* stop laughing at me and help me instead." 

"Right. Like *I'm* gonna be able to hold you up. Oh, don't look at me like that." She sighed and walked back to where he was standing. "You're pathetic." 

"Water was not meant to be walked on." 

"But you're the 'mutant messiah!" She laughed. "It should be second nature." She let him put a hand on her shoulder. "Better?" 

"Um... yeah, I think so." He blinked. "Did you just giggle?" 

"I can't help it! You look so cute when you're off balance." 

"Hrm. Remind me to drag you to family gatherings more often." 

"Oh no you don't. This is strictly a once a year occurrence. Ow... hey, lay off the shoulder a bit." 

"Sorry. I *am* glad you came, though." 

"And I'm glad you're happy." 

"You happy?" He reached out and brushed a few strands of windblown hair out of her face. 

"Not you too..." She muttered. 

"What?" 

She shook her head slightly. "Never mind." 

"Dom..." 

She looked up at him, biting her lip. "Don't. Please just... don't spoil the moment, okay?" 

He wrapped an arm around her waist. "Okay." 

"Hey, careful, don't-" 

"Flonq!" 

"Are you okay?" 

"Yeah... I'm fine. You? That didn't sound like a soft landing...." 

"...that wasn't me." 

"Shit." 

---- 

"I think it's a good idea," Jean commented as she made tea at the counter. Scott sat behind her at the kitchen table. "The professor will be back by then and-" She stopped mid-sentence, mug falling from her hand and crossing to the floor. 

"Jean!?" 

The red-headed telepath was already hastily yanking on her coat. 

---- 

The shock of hitting the cold water knocked the air from his lungs and threw off his bearings. There was light above him, but he couldn't be sure just how far he'd been swept under the ice. With cold numbed limbs he dragged himself to the surface, emerging amongst broken slabs of ice. Mercifully, the edges around the hole were reasonably thick and he managed to drag himself soaked and shivering onto the surface of the lake.   
There was no sign of Dom.   


The intense cold jolted her out of a blackout, only to find herself trapped somewhere beneath the ice on the lake. She'd already inhaled a lungful of water and her limbs felt leaden, peripheral vision beginning to fuzz out. With no better prospects in mind, she started swimming blindly, hoping her luck would hold out.   


Jean dashed out the back door, oblivious to the cold snow that bit at her ankles as she ran across the lawn to the lake. As she reached the shore, she saw Cable dragging himself onto the lake's frozen surface. "Nathan? Are you okay?"   


"Don't-" he croaked out, pulling himself into a sitting position. 

#Don't worry, I've got it.# Jean joined him on the ice, using her telekinesis to keep it from cracking apart any further. "Where's Domino?" 

He gestured back to the hole in the ice. 

"Fuck." #Scott! Blankets, lake, now!# "Nathan, head back to the shore." 

"Jean-" 

"Just go. You can't help her right now, and I can't if I'm trying to look after you." She knelt down near the open water. #Domino?# For a long moment, there was nothing, then a weak reply. 

'...Jean?' 

#Hold on.# She frowned. It wasn't going easy to split her concentration between keeping the ice stable and trying to haul Domino back to the surface. But if she could just nudge her a bit... 

Domino broke the surface of the water a moment later and Jean hauled the coughing, half frozen woman back up on the ice. 

She lay there a moment, trying to clear the lake water from her lungs. "Nate?" She managed to get out between fits. 

"He's fine. Let's get you inside." 

Scott met them at the shore, Cable standing beside him with a blanket tossed over his shoulders, still dripping wet and shivering. 

'Sorry, I tried convincing him to go inside but...' 

#But he's stubborn, I know. They'll be fine.# 

Domino pulled herself away from Jean's helping hands, grabbed up the proffered blanket and strode back towards the house. 

---- 

Scott winced as a long string of profanity reached his ears. He paused outside the medlab door a moment, wondering if he *really* wanted to go in there. With a sigh, he entered the room, two mugs in hand, deciding he'd better go in and save Hank before the abuse got physical instead of verbal. 

"I'm not sure you understand the importance of having everyone's medical history on file..." 

"Take your files and shove them, McCoy. You're *not* poking at me with all your little instruments of torture." Domino stood in the center of the room, a finger pointing accusingly at the doctor. Cable stood against one wall, and Scott thought he could see a faintly amused look on his son's face. He walked over to where Nathan stood. 

"Is that coffee?" 

Scott shook his head. "Hot cider. Hank said not to give you any caffeine. Some days, I think he has a death wish." He handed him one of the mugs and set the other on the counter. 

"That's pretty apparent," Nate replied as Dom unleashed another verbal assault on McCoy. 

"...I'm quite sure that's anatomically impossible," Beast said, seeming totally undaunted by Domino's obvious anger. "Besides, you were submerged in sub-zero water for several minutes, and inhaled a large quantity of said water. I can't, in good conscience, allow you to leave." 

She narrowed her eyes. "I'm *fine.* Cold a hell, but fine. And if you don't let me out that door, I'm going to rearrange your limbs. So why don't we just call it a day?" 

"Well, I-" 

"I think you'd better listen to her, Hank," Scott spoke up. "I'm sure Nathan will keep an eye on her." He crossed the room and handed Domino the other mug of cider. "Besides, I'm sure you'll agree they've *both* had a stressful enough day as it is." 

Hank considered this for a moment. "You do have a point." 

---- 

"You okay?" 

"Cold," she replied. "And tired. I think I might go lay down." 

He nodded and put an arm around her shoulders. He could feel a sort of shock running through her that betrayed the facade of anger and annoyance she'd been using in the medlab, a fine trembling that seemed to run through her like the hum from a high tension wire. He frowned and decided to attribute it to a fading adrenaline rush, despite the fact that he'd been getting odd impressions over the link for quite awhile now. Trying to work out what was going on with her was like trying to solve a jigsaw puzzle with half the pieces missing and no picture to work from. And Dom certainly wasn't talking.   
She stayed silent as they walked back to their room, and curled up on the bed facing away from him. With a mental sigh, he laid down next to her. The sweater she was wearing, *his* sweater, he noted idly, had slid to expose one pale shoulder.   
He ran his thumb lightly over a scar that ran along the top of her shoulder blade, light pink and fairly recent looking. 

"You never told me what this was from." At his words, he felt that 'hum' rev up again, and the muscles beneath his fingertips went taught, as if everything about her, body and mind had been drawn tight as a drum. Uneasiness pulsated like a beacon over the link and he had to wonder if she knew just how much she was broadcasting. He'd taken an almost childish delight in how their long atrophied had sprung back to life in the last few months... sprung back and thrived. And while the trouble undercurrents continued, there was much less of the outright squabbling that had previously defined their relationship.   
He wrapped his arms around her waist, trying to radiate as much calm as he could until he felt her relax in his arms. There was something so perfect about the moment, some thing so *right.* He wanted to crystallize that feeling and hang onto it, try to forget that it all could have ended out on the lake. "Eventful afternoon." He said finally. 

"Let's not repeat it. I didn't exactly enjoy the experience." 

His arms tightened around her waist, chin resting on her shoulder. A quiet sort of tension filled the darkened room, thoughts lingering on things they wouldn't say. He closed his eyes, concentrating on the feel of her in his arms, coming to terms with the fear he'd buried deep inside himself. Close calls were a way of life for them, but that didn't mean he could stop the helpless feeling he got when she was put in harm's way. He could never get used to that. No matter how many missions he ran, no matter how many close calls... there was still that heart-stopping moment of dread when he had to wonder if it was all over, if fate had played him yet another cruel hand.   
When he awoke a few hours later, Dom was still sleeping soundly. He got up, careful not to disturb her, put a throw from the chair over her shoulders and headed downstairs. 

---- 

"Well, look who's finally awake." 

Cable pulled his head out of the fridge and glanced at Jean, who was standing in the doorway. "More tired than I thought, I guess." He went back to rummaging through the leftovers from the night before. He pulled out a couple of containers then went to the cupboard for a plate. "It's quiet. Everyone went out?" 

Jean pulled out a chair and sat down at the table. "Pretty much. I think they were all planning on going to a show." 

"You and Scott didn't want to go?" 

She shrugged. "Didn't really even think much about it. With Rachel and everything else that's been happening around here, I guess we're used to it. Domino still sleeping?" 

"For once," he murmured, taking a seat opposite her. He looked up. "You should go out. It's good to take a break." 

Jean tipped her head to the side and eyed him curiously. "If I didn't *know* better, I'd be tempted to ask who you were and what you'd done with Nathan." He raised an eyebrow at her but kept eating. "You just seemed to have embraced this whole new philosophy of yours whole-heartedly. Don't get me wrong," she continued, "I'm very glad to see you happy. But it's a little unnerving at the same time." 

"Heh." 

"You know," she said, leaning on one hand. "I'm really very glad I don't have to feed you on a regular basis." 

He looked up, setting his fork down. "Dom loves to bitch about that," he replied. "I'm serious, though. I'll watch Rachel, you go out." 

She raised an eyebrow. "You sure you won't mind playing big brother for a few hours?" 

"Not at all." 

---- 

The stairs were dark and ominous before her, everything out of proportion, seen from a child's point of view.   
She knew she was dreaming, one of the scant details of her early life she still recalled. There were voices, angry, the words indecipherable behind the closed door below from around which seeped a thin halo of light. She took another step, and the board beneath her feet cracked loud as a gunshot. She stumbled, frightened, and nearly toppled down the stairs before she was caught, gentle yet strong arms wrapping her in a warm embrace as a woman's soft voice scolded her softly. 

She jerked awake in the darkness, catching her breath and trying to slow her heart. What was it about that dream that managed to terrify her every time? She rubbed her eyes blearily and looked at the clock. Eleven PM. How had she managed to sleep that late? She frowned and ran a hand back through her hair, the last traces of the dream still troubling her. No matter how hard she tried, she never could place the voices, except for the assumption that the woman, who was also in a few other of her scattered memories, must have been her mother. Banishing the thoughts, she stretched lightly and headed downstairs. 

She could hear the TV in the den faintly as she came down the stairs, as well as what sounded like... Nathan talking to himself? 

"That angel doesn't know what he's talking about, don't listen to him..." 

She peeked around the doorframe to see just what he was muttering about. He was sitting on the couch, Rachel balanced in his lap, grumbling aloud at whatever it was he was watching. 

"Enjoying yourself?" She asked, stepping into the room and leaning against the doorframe. "Because I'm pretty sure the TV can't hear you..." 

"Um..." He looked almost... embarrassed? "We're... bonding. Scott and Jean needed a night out and I thought I'd just offer... 

"Mhmmm, sure Nate." 

"Well, she's also really cute," her admitted sheepishly. 

"You can't keep her." 

"Awwww... don't you want one Dom?" 

"No. Just... No, Nate. You want something cute and a pain to take care of, I'll buy you a puppy." 

He stuck his lip out in a mock pout and she couldn't help but laugh as she sat down beside him. "And here I thought you were supposed to be the adult." She glanced at the TV. "I hate this movie." 

"Me too," he agreed. "But it's all that's on." 

"Rachel doesn't seem too enthused either," she commented, glancing at the sleeping infant in Nate's lap. "Should probably put her to bed." 

"You're right. I'll go do that..." 

"Nah. I can take her. You've been playing baby-sitter all evening anyway." 

"You sure?" 

"I think I can handle it," she replied in a slightly exasperated tone and scooped Rachel up from his lap. She stirred slightly but didn't wake as Dom cradled her gently. 

"Do you want me to make you a sandwich or something? You missed dinner." 

"Coffee?" 

"That it?" 

"I'm really not that hungry. Coffee is fine." 

He frowned. "Okay." 

---- 

"Okay, kido... lets find your pajamas okay?" She set Rachel down on the changing table, and keeping an eye on her, went looking through the dresser drawers. "Winnie the Pooh or 101 Dalmatians... glad I'm not you. You've got they entire Disney cast here..." She looked around a bit more, finally finding a pair of plain pink pjs. "Better girlie than cartoon characters I guess," she sighed. "Y'know, Nate's right, you really are too cute for your own good. I bet you've got everyone here wrapped around your finger, right?" Rachel's only reply was to giggle. "Oh, ticklish, huh? So's your brother," she whispered conspiratorially. "But you didn't hear it from me. Okay, bed time." She picked Rachel up and set her in the crib, snagging the baby monitor on her way out of the room. 

---- 

"Everything go okay?" 

"Putting an eight month old to bed isn't that hard of a task," she replied, sinking into one of the kitchen chairs. "Have a little faith in me?" 

He handed her a cup of coffee and sat down next to her. "You know I do," he replied. 

She stared down at her reflection in her coffee. "Thanks," she murmured. 

"Something the matter?" 

"I wish you'd stop asking me that," she sighed. 

"If it's what I said earlier... I was just joking." 

"Hrm? Oh, that. I know," she smiled wryly. "Don't worry about it." 

"Okay, so it's not my misplaced attempts at humor. What is it?" 

"Do we have to go over this?" She picked up her cup and wandered back into the den. "Can't we just-" 

"Dom, please." He sank down next to her on the couch. "I just want-" 

"What? What *do* you want from me, Nathan?" 

"*From* you? Oath, Dom. I just want to help..." 

"So I need help now?" She gave him a watery smile. "Gee, thanks." 

He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and gave her a tight squeeze. "Never. I'm serious, though. If you need to talk." 

She shook her head and pulled away, though she was now smiling slightly. "When did you get so concerned? I don't know *what* to do with you anymore." 

"I can think of a few things..." 

"Oh, you-" She smacked him upside the head with one of the pillows on the couch. "Hey, watch it!" She hopped off the couch as she lobed the pillow back at him. "That is... you're in trouble now." 

"Oh? We'll see who's in trouble..." 

---- 

"Didn't your mother teach you that using your TK like that was cheating?" 

"There are *rules* to pillow fights? I wasn't aware. Besides, I somehow doubt spraying me with the sprayer from the sink was legal." 

"My rules," she smirked, looping her arms around his neck as she slid into a more comfortable position on his lap. "Got a problem with that?" She leaned in and kissed him. 

"No... not at all," he replied when they finally parted for oxygen. 

She grinned. "Good. Mmmm..." 

"Nathan, are you- Oh! I'm sorry." 

The couple on the couch jerked away from each other, heads whipping around in the direction of the doorway. "Jean?" 

"I'm sorry Nathan," She said, trying to hold in laughter and failing. "I should have scanned ahead." Behind her, Scott was looking vaguely traumatized. "Well, don't mind us... we'll be on our way. And thanks for looking after Rachel." 

"Um... no problem..." 

Jean grinned. "Goodnight Nathan, Domino." 

After they'd left, Dom flopped back on the couch, laughing. 

"What's so funny?" Cable grumbled, shooting her a look. 

"You should have *seen* your face." She gasped between helpless fits of laughter. "It was *bright* red!" 

"It was embarrassing!" 

"So your parents caught us making out on the couch... so what?" She laughed again. "Aww, poor baby." 

"Don't mock me." 

"Stop pouting and I won't." 

"I am NOT pouting." 

"Are too." 

"Am not." 

"Are *too.*" 

"...this is ridiculous." 

"Yes, it is." She smirked. "So stop acting like a petulant child." 

"Oh?" 

"Hey! Put me down!" 

"Make me." 

"You are *not* carrying me up the stairs..." 

"Oh? Watch me." 

"Nathan!"   
  


"So," Jean commented as she listened to the commotion issuing from below. "Is it safe to say I win the pool?" 

Scott paused, listening as another muffled yell reached his ears. "Took them long enough."   



	3. TTaT: Another Old Lang Syne 3/4

3/4 

With a muffled groan, Domino rolled over and eyed the bedside clock. Five thirty in the morning. She frowned. Granted, she'd slept most of yesterday, but it was still an ungodly hour to be up... unless you were *still* up, but that was another matter entirely. With a sigh, she flopped back on her pillow and pulled the covers closer around her. Nate was still out like a light, which really didn't surprise her. At least one of them was getting some sleep. She lay there for another half an hour before she gave up and climbed out of bed, pulling on one of Nate's tee-shirts and a pair of shorts before heading downstairs.   


"You're up early," Jean commented as she wandered into the kitchen a few minutes later. 

"Too early," she murmured as she started up the coffee maker. She searched around for a mug and then took a seat at the table as she waited for it to finish brewing. "Why are you awake?" 

"Hrm? I'm just a morning person, I guess." Jean replied, smiling. "Besides, it's nice to get some quiet time before Scott and Rachel are awake." 

"Ah." She eyed the coffee maker again, deciding that there was enough brewed to at least fill her cup. 

"So, why are *you* awake? I take it being up at this time of the morning wasn't voluntary?" 

"Couldn't sleep," she muttered, setting the carafe back on the hot plate. 

"Does that happen often?" 

She arched an eyebrow at the redheaded telepath. "On occasion." 

Jean nodded. "I see." 

"What?" Dom snapped in irritation. 

"I didn't mean anything by it. Nathan just seemed a bit concerned about you, that's all. I was only wondering if he had just cause. You know, you can talk to Hank, he may be able to help-" 

"No. It- it's just insomnia. Happens on occasion. I'll get over it." 

Jean sighed and sipped her tea. "It's your call, of course. I just want you to know that you're a part of this family, Domino, odd as it is. You don't have to be a stranger." 

"Um," she stood there for a moment, looking uncomfortable. "I think I'm going to go run a practice session." She downed the last of the coffee and left the room. 

---- 

"What are you doing?" 

"What does it *look* like? I'm putting on my uniform." She zipped up the blue-black body-suit and grabbed her belt from on the dresser. 

"Why? It's only six thirty. Did something-" 

"I'm just going for a workout in the Danger Room. Go back to sleep." 

"I'm awake now. Might as well get up. Want company?" 

"I think I just want to fly solo on this one." 

"Are you sure you're up to that after yesterday?" 

"I feel fine. I could use a spotter though, I guess," she replied, tugging on a glove. 

"Okay. Let me get dressed." 

--- 

Cable glanced up from the observation window as the doors to the booth swished open and Jean walked in. She arched an eyebrow as she glanced at the simulation. Domino was tearing into the robotic adversaries with abandon, leaving nothing but wreckage in her wake. 

"Is she trying to prove something?" She asked, settling down into one of the chairs. 

"To herself, maybe," Cable murmured in reply. "Working out frustration, mostly." 

"Working out frustrations," her eyes skimmed the control panel "on a program meant for three people and with the safeties off. That must be some stress she's got to get rid of." 

"Jean, I know you don't approve. But I'm acting as spotter, and Dom can handle herself." 

"I'm just trying to *understand* her, Nathan. She won't talk to me." 

"Good luck," he commented. "There are some days *I* don't know what makes her tick. And don't take it personally. She's just not much of a people person." 

"That's putting it lightly," she replied, taking a sip of her tea. 

"She has her own issues to deal with," he continued, watching the room below as he took a swallow of coffee. "Everyone is looking for her to be a team player, to be something she's not... is it any wonder she doesn't like coming here? X-Force knows how she operates, knows her boundaries. But here-" he shook his head. 

"She won't let us get to know her, Nathan. She pushes us all away. With the exception of you and Logan, none of us know a thing about her." 

"Don't you think it's a little hypocritical to expect answers from *her* when you don't demand them from your own teammates? I seem to recall that neither Gambit nor Rogue are too fond of divulging information." 

"You're right," she sighed. "But I'd like to think that all I'm doing is extending an offer of friendship." 

"And when it comes to Dom, that's a very difficult thing to earn, Jean. When you live each day expecting to be stabbed in the back," he said darkly, "you learn very quickly not to trust *anyone.*" 

"She trusts you." 

"It took her walking out on me, and three years for me to realize just how significant that was," he said soberly. "You're just going to have to trust me on this, Jean. Don't push her. She'll share what she wants *when* she wants, and not a moment before. There's not a force in the universe that can make Dom do what she doesn't want to." 

"I'll take your word for it," she replied. "Let's talk about something else, then." 

"Like what?" He asked warily. There was something in her tone that put him on guard. Jean may have been undeniably kind-hearted, but he knew she could also be devious as hell. 

"I don't know. What you've been up to, what you're going to do after you leave here... You don't call home nearly enough," she mock-scolded him, a smile on her face. 

"There's really not much to tell," he replied, glancing back into the Danger Room, noting that the simulation was almost over. "As much as I hate to admit it, X-Force really doesn't need looking after anymore. They're pretty good at taking care of themselves." 

"They all stayed in San Francisco?" 

"Actually, I think they were heading back with Sam to Kentucky." 

Jean nodded. "So they don't really need you anymore." 

"They've had a lot of experience, and Sam's a good leader. I think as long as they stayed in contact with you-" he paused as the door slid open and Domino walked in. 

"Now that's what I call a workout," she commented. "Have to admit I missed practicing in there. Sorry, did I interrupt?" She asked, giving Jean a wary glance. 

"I was telling Jean that we thought the kids could probably be trusted on their own." 

Dom nodded. "Well, don't let me interfere. I'm gonna go shower off. I'll catch you later, Nate." 

"What are you going to do if you leave the team?" Jean asked after Domino had vanished again. "There's plenty of room here..." 

Cable shook his head. "We're not X-Men, Jean. You know that. We don't belong here. Dom mentioned a place she has in Oregon...sounds nice. And we'd still be close enough to keep an eye on X-Force. At least in the beginning." 

Jean nodded slowly. "I see. Just the two of you then?" 

"Don't get any ideas," he scowled. 

"It's just good-natured meddling," she replied, patting him on the shoulder as she got up from her seat. 

"That's what I'm afraid of," he grumbled. 

She laughed and headed for the door. "Well, Charles will be back later this afternoon. You should probably run this by him, see what he thinks." 

Cable nodded. "I'll do that." 

----   


"So what did I walk in on?" Domino asked when he caught up with her back in their room. 

"Nothing much," he replied. 

"Really," she said, eyeing him suspiciously as she dried her hair with a towel. 

He sighed. "She just wants to get to know you Dom. She's not asking you to tell her your life story." 

"Do I need her approval?" She asked icily. 

"Oath, Dom. Do you think I *care* if anyone 'approves' of you or not? It doesn't matter to *me* what they think. The real question here is does it matter to *you*? 

"No," she snapped, tossing the towel over her shoulder, where it draped itself neatly over the arm of a chair. "Well, okay, maybe a little. But only so they stop looking at me like I've sprouted a third eyeball or something." 

"You're cute when you're flustered, you know that, Dom?" 

"Shut up, Summers," she said. 

He grinned. "In that case, I guess I shouldn't mention that I told Jean about moving to Oregon?" 

"Oh, great," she rolled her eyes. "Now they'll be spreading wild rumors about us." 

"Wild rumors, huh?" He asked, wrapping his arms around her waist. "Well, if they're going to do that anyway, we might as well give them good reason." 

---- 

The door to Xavier's office was partially open, but he rapped twice anyway before sticking his head in the doorway. "Charles?" 

"Come in, Nathan. Jean mentioned there was something you wanted to discus?" 

"About X-Force, yes." 

"Oh?" 

"I've given it some consideration, and I think it's time to let them work on their own. They've more than proven their independence-" 

"They're still children, Nathan." 

Cable frowned. "No, they're young adults. There's a difference. And they'll never learn anything if I'm there holding their hands the entire way." 

"The sink or swim method of learning then?" 

"Not hardly. Domino and I will still have some involvement. And they know they can come to us for help on anything. But there's a difference between keeping a watchful eye on them and keeping them under our thumb. I think they've earned this." 

"No ulterior motives?" Xavier asked. 

Cable paced the length of the room and ran a hand back through his hair. "I've been a soldier for a very long time," he said finally. "I've given up all there was to give, and for the first time, I have a chance to get some of it back. Is it wrong that I should want to take that opportunity?" 

"Not at all," the Professor replied. "It's your right. Very well, I think the idea is a fairly sound one. I take it you'll run it past X-Force and relay their reactions to me?" 

"Of course." 

---- 

"How'd it go?" Dom asked, leaning against the wall outside the office. 

"You could have come in." 

"You don't need me to argue your points for you. So?" She asked again, taking up stride next to him as he headed down the hall. 

"He agreed." 

"Just like that?" 

"Pretty much. Seemed satisfied that we'd be around to handle anything that got to be too much for them." 

"Huh. Never thought it'd be that easy." 

"I think," Cable said, "we had a sort of understanding." 

"Hrm. I'll take your word for it. I never claimed to understand how these people operate anyway."   



	4. TTaT: Another Old Lang Syne 4/4

4/4   


"Hey, guys, they're showing a tape of the conference!" There was a bit of commotion as everyone piled into the room and gathered around the TV. 

"Drake! Down in front! And turn up the volume."   


"...as I said earlier, GenCorp is merely providing a service to those who want it. Our corporation doesn't look upon pre-natal testing for mutation to be any different than the testing done for Cystic Fibrosis or Downs syndrome," James Rown, GenCorp's spokesman and top researcher said. "Anyone who says otherwise is simply trying to create hysterics and halt progress." 

"Then you don't believe there's any cause for mutants to be concerned about the testing you're proposing, Dr. Rown?" The professor asked. 

"None whatsoever. After all, it's completely voluntary. We're not forcing any women to take the test. It's merely an option, allowing them to know if a problem exists and letting them make an informed decision about what to do." 

"You work from the standpoint that being a mutant is a 'disease,' Dr. Rown, correct?" 

"My company and I view the issue as a disorder, yes. It's an ailment that can greatly reduce the quality of life for both the afflicted and those around them. Just as with any other genetic condition." 

"So the claims that you're trying to eliminate mutants by 'selective breeding' are unjustified." 

"Goodness yes," the geneticist replied. "After all, we are not playing God here, Professor. Nor are we the Nazis some have tried to paint us as. As doctors and scientists, we have only the welfare of our patients in mind, and believe that they should be allowed to chose whether or not they want to raise a child that is known to be a mutant...." 

"Boo!" Bobby tossed a handful of popcorn at the TV. "That's such a crock." 

"Does he actually *believe* that, Professor?" 

"Apparently, Jean. Which has me worried." 

The redhead shuddered slightly. "I can't believe anyone could think like that. To think that any of us shouldn't have been allowed to live because of our genes?" She reached down and scooped her daughter up from where she was crawling on the floor. "That Scott and I should have..." She stopped and shook her head. 

"Not to mention," Henry spoke up, "That the true nature of the x-factor has yet to be determined. I fail to see how any laboratory could hope to have an accurate test." 

"It's a matter of supply and demand," Warren said grimly. "People want it. They probably aren't concerned with the accuracy." On the television, the clip of the conference had ended and the news reporter continued. 

"There are some concerns in the medical community about this proposed testing, both to its accuracy, and to its safety. While leaders for organizations such as the friends of humanity are lobbying for a version of the test to be administered to all newborns in the United States..." 

"Sometimes I just don't understand these people," Scott murmured under his breath. 

From the back of the room Domino scowled and rolled her eyes. "Welcome to America, a model of equality for the whole world..." 

"This is depressing. We risk our lives tryin' t' make things better for mutants and these people just keep coming up with more ways t' discriminate. Makes ya wonder if we're ever gonna make things better." Rogue commented, eyes still locked on the TV. 

"We do the best we can," Jean replied. 

Xavier nodded. "For that is all we can do." 

"The best just doesn't cut it, Charles. It never will," Domino said, coolly meeting the looks several of the assembled gave her. 

"What Dom means is-" 

"I know perfectly well what I mean, Nathan." She snapped. "I mean what I said. You can't change the world with one man's ideals. It just isn't going to happen. Not this way, at any rate. And I really don't appreciate being censored." She shot Cable an angry look and strode out of the room, leaving Cable to deal with the befuddled stares of his family.   
He found her later out by the lake, sitting on the end of the dock, eyes locked on the hole still visible in the ice. He stood on the shore for a few moments, then walked across the weathered boards to where she was seated. "I shouldn't have said what I did." 

"It doesn't really matter," she replied. "I probably shouldn't have said what *I* did." 

"They needed to hear it." 

"Maybe. Not from me. Something they'll have to figure out for themselves, not from someone on the outside." 

"They don't think of you like that, and you know it." 

"Yeah," she sighed. "Maybe." 

"You didn't have this problem when we were living here with X-Force. Or you didn't mention it," he sighed. 

"I didn't... it wasn't the same thing, really. I was here, helping you deal with the kids. It was our business and everyone else just left us to it. But now... maybe that's the thing. Now they *do* care, and I don't want them to. I don't need McCoy grilling me with questions or your mother trying to drug me-" 

"Wait. What? When was this?" 

"This morning. Made the mistake of mentioning I hadn't slept well..." 

"I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it." 

"Probably not, no. But I feel like... I don't know. Like I'm tolerated because I'm with you." She laughed wryly, still looking away from him. "It's childish and stupid of me. I don't *really* care if they like me or not." 

"Rachel seems to like you," he said, taking a seat next to her on the dock. Her gaze was still fixed on the hole in the ice. 

"You're getting senile. Kids hate me." 

"You're not going to let that go, are you?" 

"Mmm. And you're not going to let *this* go." 

"You're right." 

"Of course I am. You're a stubborn son of a bitch," she replied, turning to face him. 

"Don't bring my mother into this," he smirked. 

"Oh, that's right. We're talking about your sister." 

"Right. She doesn't hate you Dom. She's only eight months old!" 

"Nate," she said, peering at him, "why aren't you going to let this go?" 

He reached out and pushed her hair out of her face. "What are you looking for, Dom?" 

"What?" She asked, confused. 

"You're looking for something... I was wondering what it was." 

"I have no idea what you're talking about," she replied, deliberately not looking him in the eye. "Why I would I be looking for anything?" 

He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her next to him. "You seem lost." 

"Are you sure you didn't smack your head on the headboard this morning? You're acting a bit weird." 

"I'm serious Dom," he replied. "You said it yourself... you're in limbo. And don't think you can hide it from me," he said sternly. "I know you too well for that." 

"Does it bother you?" She asked, abruptly changing topics. 

"Does *what* bother me?" 

"That Rachel... she's young enough to be your granddaughter, Nate. Does it-" 

He frowned. "What? Make me feel old?" He laughed wryly. "Maybe it should..." He trailed off, something occurring to him as he stared into her dark eyes. "Is that what this is? Is it making *you* feel old?" 

"No! I mean..." She sighed and pulled away from him, drawing her knees up and wrapping her arms around them. "It makes me realize how long we've been doing this, Nate. How we never left time for anything else." 

"Ah." He edged over slightly and pulled her into his lap, feeling her shiver as he wrapped her in his arms. Normally, she might have tried to resist such an affectionate gesture, but he could tell she was too tired to fight anymore. She leaned back and rested her head on his shoulder. 

"I guess I just can't help wondering why I let it be that way. I know I didn't have the best control over my life... but I certainly didn't go out of my way to make it any better, did I? You had your destiny... you couldn't help that. And no matter how much it pissed me off," she paused. "Or tore me up inside," she continued in a quieter voice, "I knew that at least you were fighting for a reason." 

"You had your own reasons Dom," he said. "And I know you've done a lot of good. Look at all you've accomplished with the kids... wasn't that worth it?" 

"Yeah, it was," she replied. "But that's only a fraction of it all. And the years that most people look back on as the best of their lives are nothing but nightmares for me." She gestured to the lake. "We could have died out there..." 

"We could have died a lot of places," he replied. "You know that." 

"Yeah, I know that. Just seems more real this time. Maybe... I dunno. Maybe because we decided to give this an honest to goodness try, I just feel like something was trying to cheat us." She looked up at him, brows drawn together in a slightly confused look. "I don't want to lose you." She frowned, resisting the urge to pull away because she didn't want to punish him for her own unease at the undeniably 'needy' feeling she had.   
It was enough to make her head spin. She'd spent her entire life trying to prove her independence. Domino didn't need anyone. It had always been one of the basic cornerstones of who she was. No one, no thing, would ever put her in chains. She'd never wanted to be dependant, had feared that eventuality as she feared almost nothing else on earth. The conviction, however, did not come without it's sacrifices. She'd closed herself off, locked herself away so securely that after awhile, even *she* couldn't see past the walls she'd built. And somewhere along the way, loneliness had crept in and caught her unaware.   
She was still the same enigmatic woman on the outside, tough and self-assured, but inside she could feel that emptiness eating away at her, and a new fear asserted itself at the back of her brain. The fear that all she was on the *inside* would wither away and leave only that battle hardened shell. She'd never wanted to *become* the facade.   
But she'd come close. Really goddamned close. Especially after she'd walked out on Nathan. She could feel the last of the human being in her crumpling up and giving in, deciding she'd abused it one too many times.   
And now? She really wasn't sure. There were so many things that tugged at her in the middle of the night, too many unhealed wounds demanding attention that she had to wonder how she stayed sane. She tried her best to melt into Nathan's arms, to combat the cold of the air with his warmth and try to forget all of the things weighing her down. All she wanted to do is find that little part of her that was utterly content, and to cling to that with all her might. 

He held her hands in his own, trying to warm her cold fingers. Strong hands, lined and scared from years of battle but still graceful like those of a piano player... he wanted to ask her if she had ever played, even though he knew it was a foolish question. She'd never shown any musical inclination aside from the music she occasionally saw fit to blast over the stereo, usually when she was in a better than normal mood. Her fingernails weren't painted their normal vibrant red, he noticed with a slight frown. Just a clear-coat of some sort. 

"Is there something particularly enthralling about my hands, or can I have them back?" 

His head jerked up at the sound of her voice, feeling almost embarrassed she'd caught him staring like that. "No nail polish," he said by way of an excuse. 

She shrugged. "Didn't feel like dealing with the hassle." 

"I like the red," he replied, still holding her hands, reluctant to let go. 

"Are you sure I shouldn't have McCoy CAT-scan you or something?" 

"I think I'm offended." 

"You're being silly." 

"I try to act nice, and you accuse me of having a head injury. I think I'm allowed." 

"I didn't mean it like that." 

"I know you didn't." He kissed the back of her hand briefly and let go. "Apparently," he said after a moment of silence, "We're all going out to dinner for Christmas Eve." 

"Where?" 

"Don't know. It was Jean's idea... I suppose someplace upscale. I don't suppose you have anything to wear with you." 

"No," she sighed. "You?" 

"Nope." 

"Great. So we get to go shopping two days before Christmas."   
"Yep." 

"I don't suppose you could convince Apocalypse to conveniently resurrect himself to get us out of this?" 

---- 

It had taken a few hours, but they'd managed to hunt down clothes that would fit him, and Dom had bought herself something that she hadn't let him see. "It's a surprise," she'd said, grinning. "You'll see it tomorrow anyway." They'd gotten dinner in the city, and Domino had seen fit to drink half the bottle of wine by herself, which, while putting her in a better mood, had made him glad he was the one with the car keys.   
She'd complained of a headache on the drive home and had disappeared into the bedroom not long after they got back. He hadn't seen her the rest of the night. He wasn't to the point where he was worried about her yet, she hadn't been acting that much different from normal, certainly nothing to set off warning bells. Still, he felt a sort of uneasiness curled in the pit of his stomach that had him brushing over their link every so often, just to be sure everything was all right.   
There were things he wanted to say- to point out that she'd gotten thinner than was probably good for her, that more nights than not, she hardly slept at all and that maybe she should do something about it. There was a point where you had to stop passing things off as 'stress' and start wondering if something was really wrong. He sighed. There were still all of these issues that hung between them that neither wanted to approach, for fear that what they'd built was too fragile to carry that weight. 

She was sound asleep when he finally turned in, curled up on her half of the bed clinging to the blankets with a death grip. He leaned over and kissed her forehead, brushing a stray lock of hair back behind her ear. She didn't so much as stir, so he leaned back on his own pillow and went to sleep.   
It was quarter after one by the bedside clock when he jerked awake, covered in sweat and mind on fire, as though he were under some sort of psionic assault. His shields tightened reflexively and the attack ended almost instantly, leaving him with only vague impressions of what it had been. He took several deep breaths to slow his heart rate back to normal, then tried to straighten his thoughts. Now that he was more awake, and in better control of the situation, he was able to tell that it *hadn't* been an actual attack. Whatever it was would have been far too weak to penetrate his shields. Closing his eyes he tried to trace the event back to its source, and when he did, he found himself staring straight down his psilink with Dom.   
She was laying there just as she had when he'd come to bed, still hanging onto the covers so tightly her knuckles were white, even against the paleness of her skin. He reached over and brushed her hair back from her face, fingers trailing lightly over her skin. "Dom?" Nothing. 

#Dom?# Not even a twitch. Her end of the link was silent and dark, but undisturbed. He lay down again and stared at the ceiling, not wanting to sleep until he'd sorted this all out. That hadn't been a normal nightmare on Dom's end. After more than a decade, with *and* without the link, he'd pretty much gotten her responses to such things memorized. Often, she woke before he did, shaking and trying to catch her breath. And even when she didn't wake... This didn't feel the same. It wasn't the morbid conjurings of a dreaming mind, more like a memory being played back in a high-speed loop, over and over in a cycle he couldn't break, only watch, helplessly, as it rewound and played itself back again and again.   
The phantom pain danced like fire on the other side of his reinforced shields and with his eyes closed, mind calmed to an almost meditative state, he found himself watching it with a macabre fascination, half tempted to throw his end of the psilink open to see if he could relieve some of her torment by taking it on himself. But uncertainty and respect for her privacy made him keep his distance.   
By four thirty the 'dream' began to fade until he felt Dom slip into normal sleep, saw her relax, tense muscles going slack. He breathed a shaky sigh of relief, his own eyes closing in exhaustion. 

---- 

"Up before noon?" 

"Huh?" Cable turned away from the coffee pot, mug in hand. "Yeah, I guess," he muttered as he took a sip. He eyed Scott cautiously. "What?" 

"Nothing," he replied, leaning against the fridge door. 

"Hmph. Jean around?" 

"In the den with Rachel. Why?" 

"Something I need to ask her about," he frowned. 

Scott nodded. "I heard you're leaving X-Force." 

"Leaving," he replied. "Is not quite the right word." 

"Turning over leadership, then." 

"You don't approve." 

"Not my decision. You know those kids better than I do, better than anyone here. I trust your judgment." 

"At least someone does..." He murmured, and wandered out of the room to find Jean.   


"Good morning, Nathan," she said brightly. 

"Morning," he replied gruffly, sinking down on the couch next to her. "Hey Rachel," he continued in a friendlier tone. He glanced back at Jean. "I need to ask you about something." 

"Of course," she smiled, but trailed off at seeing the expression on his face. "Is something wrong?" 

"Maybe..." he paused and ran a hand through his hair. "I can't make heads or tails of it and though maybe you could." He began relating the event of the previous night as best he could while she listened, a worried expression growing on her face. 

"It *sounds* like some sort of psychic trauma," she said when he'd finished. "But that doesn't make sense. Unless she'd come in contact with something recently..." 

He shook his head. "I would have known it." He frowned. "I couldn't 'see' anything, really, just feel it. It seemed more like a memory. But that doesn't make sense either." 

Jean sighed. "I don't suppose you'd know if she'd had any contact previous to this." 

"There is *something,*" he frowned. "But..." 

"I'm not going to blab this to anyone Nathan, you know that." 

"I feel like I'm going behind her back. I should have waited..." 

Jean put a hand on his arm. "Obviously you're concerned for her. I can't imagine she'd hold that against you." 

"Dom just might," he muttered. "But she probably wouldn't agree to talk to you of her own free will either..." He leaned back on the couch and stared up at the ceiling for a few moments before glancing over at Jean again. "This doesn't leave the room," he said seriously. She nodded. "Dom's got memories missing... she doesn't talk about it much, but I've seen it, like an old mental scar. She doesn't know how it happened." 

"And you think this is a connection?" 

"Maybe... it's a possibility. I don't know what she was doing when we weren't together. And it would explain some things..." He sighed. "I think this is something I'm going to have to talk to her about. I could be overreacting." 

"Well, I don't think you are, but getting her cooperation in trying to work it out is probably the best way to go." 

"Easier said than done," he frowned. The uneasiness that had haunted him yesterday was now like a lead weight that left him feeling vaguely ill. On the surface, things were still the same, but underneath he could feel the darkness advancing. He stood and waked towards the door. "Jean, thanks... for the advice." 

"I hope everything turns out all right. I'm here, if you need to talk," she smiled almost wistfully, as if despite her optimistic words, she too could feel the disturbance that hung in the air. 

---- 

"Sleep well?" 

"Oh, Christ, Nate. I didn't even see you there." She sat up, brushing her hair out of her face. "What time is it?" 

"Almost one." 

"Shit. Why'd you let me sleep that long?" 

He straightened up from where he'd been leaning in the corner of the room and approached the bed. "That's what we need to talk about." 

"You've lost me here, Nate." 

"What happened Dom? What aren't you telling me?" 

"Nothing! I'm not keeping *anything* from you." 

"That's bullshit," he said with a calm that unnerved her, "and you know it." 

She scowled at him as she got up and went to retrieve clothes from the dresser. "What the *hell* is wrong with you, Nathan? Wake up on the wrong side of the bed or what?" She yanked her clothes on, still shooting him an angry look. 

"No," he replied. "Actually, I spent most of the night watching over someone whose mind was busy tearing itself to shreds."   
Most of the anger on her face evaporated as she looked at him in bewilderment. "What? Did something- who?" 

"You honestly don't know." 

"Stop talking in circles! Who the hell are you talking about?" She cried in exasperation, trying to decipher the emotions that were playing across his face. 

"You," he said in a voice that was dead serious. 

She sank down on the bed, looking at him in utter incomprehension. "I don't understand," she said quietly, swallowing hard past the lump in her throat and trying to fight of a feeling of dread. 

"I sat here for almost four hours watching as you had a little psychic 'episode' so strong I had to shield the link. I had to *deliberately* shut you out, Dom. There wasn't a thing I could do to wake you up, you were that damned gone. Don't try and tell me that there's nothing going on here," he continued in a softer tone. " 'Nothing' doesn't send someone into the sort of mental shock I was reading off you. You had me scared to death." 

She squeezed her eyes shut and took a ragged breath before looking up at him. Even in the dim light of the room she could see the pain and concern written on his face. "I don't remember a thing." She said finally. "Not a God damned thing." She realized she was shaking. 

"Dom... Oath. What happened to you?" 

"Just life, Nathan." She turned away from him, wrapping her arms around herself. "Nothing out of the ordinary. I'm sorry you had to see that." 

"Nothing out of the ordinary," he repeated in disbelief. "Don't tell me you believe that." 

"Don't I?" She shot back at him. "It was my own damned fault. I was sloppy, and I paid for it. It happens. I'm dealing." 

"What I saw last night was not 'dealing.' And no matter how stubborn and bullheaded you insist on being, it's *not* going to go away. I'm not blind, Dom. I've noticed things weren't right here, but I didn't say anything. And I wanted to. But I was foolish enough to believe that if you really needed help, you'd come to me. I though I had your trust." 

"I-" She started, but couldn't find the words to continue. All the delusions she'd been living with were starting to evaporate and she felt as if she were slipping backwards down a slope with nothing to grasp onto to stop her fall. 

"Something happened to you, someone did something to you that's left you like this, torn up inside and out. Something that makes you cringe whenever I ask about that scar on your shoulder. Someone hurt you, and you won't let me help you get better." 

She stood and walked away from him, trying to find some rational for what she was thinking. "We're broken people, Nate," she said finally, her voice so soft he could hardly make it out. "Razor sharp shards held together by rusty baling wire. Animated pain, walking, talking, mobile anguish. A mass of scars and wounds that no one sees. Every move we make makes new cuts and reopens the old ones. We never heal, we just go on, fighting through misery for reasons we don't even know. Driven on by a need to survive and some stupid notion that someday, we'll find a way to make it 'okay'."   
She took a deep breath. "I'm tired of fighting." She felt as if the strength had leaked out of her, left her hollow and about to crumple. Something in her snapped, the irony of the situation too much, and she started to laugh before she could stop herself. "Oh God," she tried to breath past the degenerating laughter until she was practically sobbing. "Some Christmas, huh? Christ." She hadn't noticed him cross the room, but Nathan's hands were suddenly on her shoulders, holding her gently but firmly. 

"Dom... Dom!" 

"I'm sorry... I'm-" she stopped and caught her breath. "I'm okay." She looked into his eyes and winced at what she saw there. Fear. Actual fear lurking behind his gaze. "God, I sure know how to ruin a party, huh?" She leaned her head against his chest, letting him wrap his arms around her as she listened to his heartbeat. "I'll be okay. I needed to get that off my chest." 

"You're lying." 

"I know. But it's Christmas." 

---- 

"What *are* you doing in there?" He asked through the closed bathroom door. She'd snuck in there with her change of clothes and had been puttering around for a good half an hour. The good news was, she genuinely seemed to be in a better mood, which let him relax a little. 

"You're too impatient!" She laughed. "I'm almost done." 

"I'm just curious." 

"Okay, okay." She sighed. "I can do my makeup out there I guess." She opened the door and stepped out. "Well?" 

"I- um... That's *really* nice," he replied, looking her up and down. The dress was ankle length with spaghetti straps and an empire waist, the same rich amethyst as her eyes. She'd pinned part of her hair back, leaving the rest to fall in lose waves around her shoulders. 

"Glad you like it. You don't look bad yourself." She said, surveying his grey collarless shirt and black slacks. She gave him a quick peck on the cheek and went to the mirror over the dresser to finish with her makeup. Behind her, Nathan began digging through a bag, looking for something. 

"Dom?" 

"Hmm?" She asked turning away from the mirror. "I'm almost done..." 

"We've got time," he replied. "Actually, there was something I wanted to give you." 

She raised an eyebrow. "Oh?" 

"I know, we're not doing the gift thing. But it's not, well, here." He handed her a long flat package wrapped in silver paper. "Go ahead and open it." 

She unwrapped the package carefully, then snapped open the lid on the box. "Nathan..." She looked up, eyes questioning. 

"I... just wanted you to know where my priorities lay, Dom. You were talking about finding new meaning in the world. And we both know that my mission always came first..." 

She stared down at the box again. Against the black velvet lining, the silver pendant, no larger than a nickel, shone brightly, the light glinting off the upraised phoenix in its center. 

"I guess it's just my way of saying I'm never going to let that happen again. From now on, you're my only mission. Especially with... well." He shrugged. 

She looked up at him, trying to suppress tears and laughter at the same time. "You romantic son of a bitch..." 

"Glad you like it." 

---- 

"You're doing it again." 

"What?" 

"You know what," she replied, staring up at the giant tree that towered over Rockefeller plaza. "You keep... checking on me." She'd felt his feather-light touch over the link several times during dinner. Beyond all logic, he had somehow agreed to keep what had happened in the bedroom between them, at least until they'd had time to talk more. She wasn't stupid, she knew he wasn't just going to let it slide, no matter how much she wished he would. And to be brutally honest, she'd scared *herself* with the loss of control. He was right, this wasn't something that was going to go away on its own, and that had her frightened as well. 

She turned to face him and tipped her head to the side, studying the tightness around his eyes that meant he was blaming himself for something. "I'm sorry," she said. "And please don't go Askani on me, okay? I really am. This... isn't your fault Nate. I should have seen it coming." She glanced away. "I mean, after awhile, something's got to give. I pushed myself too far." 

"I let you," he murmured. "I knew, and I didn't say anything." 

She sighed, reaching out and taking his hands in hers. "The damage was done, Nate. It was already there the day I met you in Cannes. I always have been good at pretending I was all right, even when I was dying inside. But I had no right to do this to you." She squeezed his hands tightly, looking up at the dark sky overhead for a long moment before she looked back into his eyes. "And now... I guess I'm asking for your help." 

He was silent for a long moment. "You have that Dom. Always... forever." The last word was spoken with some difficulty, she knew how hard it must have been to utter. But she could also feel his sincerity. 

She leaned up to kiss him, whispering softly, so only he could hear "I love you, Nathan." 

End 


End file.
